Thoughts Masquerading As Feelings
In the latter years of the last century it became at least okay if not expected that people would express their feelings to one another. But not everyone who got the memo declaring that feelings were okay is able or willing to recognize or express them. That was when people began to pawn off thoughts as if they were feelings.
Here is a tip for those who wish to get better at distinguishing thoughts from feelings. Whenever you hear yourself or someone else begin a sentence with the words, “I feel that…”, be prepared to hear a thought, usually judgmental, masquerading as a feeling. “I feel that she is avoiding me.” “I feel that the car is overpriced.” Those are thoughts, not feelings.
When the Tampa Bay Rays signed outfielder Pat Burrell, Rays’ executive vice president of baseball operations Andrew Friedman got it wrong when he said, “We feel like he fits in very well with our existing personnel and will make our lineup even stronger.” “We feel like…” is another way of saying, “We feel that.”
When we express feelings it sounds like, “I’m angry”, or “sad”, or “lonely”, or some explicit feeling term. “I feel that…” is always an introduction to a thought.
