I’m not mentioning names here. This is far bigger than she is; she is merely a highly visible carrier (and I don’t need Googled blog hits enough to risk infection myself). This plague is spread by a few politicians, and by certain news organizations, web sites, blogs, and even religious institutions.

Stay safe. Protect yourself. Remain hopeful and intelligent.

(If you don’t know whose hand that is with the crib notes on it, go here to find out.)
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The first towering conclusion is that people commit to other people, so anyone who wishes to lead, to win the commitment of others in order to create change, must become the kind of person who attracts commitment. It is more than a matter of learning skills or competencies. It is a matter of living a life. As one leader told me, “How wonderful would it be if you were known through your life as ‘Honest Abe’? How much could you do? Wouldn’t that be amazing, to have that reputation?”

The second towering conclusion is that a compelling insight about the needs or aspirations of a group of people is far more important to inspiring commitment than is a vision. Visions that truly compel are founded on such insights and are faithful to them.

The third towering conclusion is that reflection is not time away from the job of leadership but is an integral part of the job. Another leader said it best: “You have to reflect on why you are doing what you are doing…or you are lost.”

And the final towering conclusion is that, in order for a leader to inspire exceptional commitment from others, equal concentration on mind, heart, and spirit is not optional; it is essential. Understand it, feel it, surrender to it.

(This post is an excerpt from The Art Of Winning Commitment)
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It was a during a weekend leadership seminar in Northern Ireland. The dozen or so participants were owners of small to medium sized companies, senior managers from a major corporation, and assorted others including a Catholic nun. The seminar was part of a business school’s Master of Science in Leadership program. The man who directed the program noticed that his students often failed to ask directly for what they want—not good if you desire to lead. He asked me (I was leading the seminar) to address the issue.

We sat in a circle and discussed the difficulty of asking for what you want, the whys and hows of doing so, and then I suggested that we practice. The first few people to speak asked for what you would expect.

“I want new accounts for the business.”

“I want more energy from my people.”

It was the nun’s turn. She said, “I want someone to give me a house.”

The group was stunned by the direct, specific request. It seemed very improbable: who gives houses away? It also seemed audacious and absurd! A few people laughed; others smirked.

The man sitting next to her asked why she wanted a house. She explained that she wanted to set up a shelter for mothers and children who needed a temporary place to live.

He told her, “I have several houses that I need to get rid of. You can have one; two if you want them.”

The company for which he worked had purchased a property on which it intended to build a manufacturing plant. There was a row of abandoned houses along the edge of the property. He was given the task of renovating and selling them. He was offering to give her one or two newly renovated houses.

For the second time in just a few minutes, the group was stunned. But now there was no laughter and no smirking.

The exchange between the man and the nun was a dramatic demonstration of what we had talked about during our discussion: that you have a much better chance of getting what you want if you ask for it, and if you ask in a direct and specific way. Also that doing so is an indicator of strength rather than weakness: the others then recognized her request as an act of courage.

Go ahead. Ask. Ask whoever else might read this. Use the comment link below, and remember to be direct and specific.

P.S. I don’t have any houses to give away.

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